Full Circle

I'll never understand why life unfolds the way it does.  Why events happen.  Why things fall apart.  Why plans fail or never come to fruition.  Why people come and go.  Why philosophical questions on life, death, and everything in between are left unanswered.

In my twenties, I constantly questioned the gray areas of life and never accepted anything short of an authentic black and white answer.  I gather that's the reason why I lived my twenties in constant upheaval, thriving on 100% pure angst.

In my thirties, however, I've resigned myself to the fact that I'll never be privy to life's reasoning.  Instead, I've come to believe that things happen for a reason.  The reason may not be clear at the moment, but in time, it will. 

In time, you'll discover that you've come full circle; that the answers to questions keeping you up at night were within you all along and the gray areas of life weren't as daunting as you once thought they were.  You'll discern that you're exactly where you're meant to be, on this very path you're traveling on, and you'll appreciate the steep hills, narrow bends, and formidable obstacles you've overcome.  And in the end, you'll look back on your life, a rich tapestry of experiences both good and bad, and want for nothing.

This is what I believe. This is what keeps me from giving in to the darkness within.  This is what keeps me on my path.  After all, there has to be something more than simply getting by.  There has to be...

"Whatever our struggles and triumphs, 

however we may suffer them, 

all too soon they bleed into a wash, 

just like the watery ink on paper."

- Memoirs of a Geisha, Arthur Golden

A life lived authentically and to its fullest is a rare and beautiful thing.